Anyone who has been pregnant has had one of those experiences. That time when someone says something so totally absurd about your pregnancy that your jaw literally hits the floor. You cannot imagine how these people get through life on a daily basis when such total and utter stupidity can come out of their mouths. Even worse is that the majority of these comments come from women who have also endured the 9 long months of pregnancy and the emotional hurdles that go along with it!
We all loved when people commented on our weight, judged our decisions and constantly told us how we were going to harm our child before they were even born….because we weren’t freaking ourselves out enough – we for sure needed their assistance in pushing us right over the edge! Well sit back and enjoy some doozies! These will knock your socks off! (on a happier and more positive note – check out these super cute Gender Reveal Party Ideas!)
Thanks to all of you for for submitting your “stupid things people say to pregnant women” on my Facebook page! I sifted through and pulled out the best of the best (and I couple I wanted to include, but just couldn’t…. they were SO not okay!!)
- I am going to start out with one of my own! I was pregnant with my third. I already had two beautiful boys. A work colleague asked me if I knew what I was having. “Yes, it is a boy!” I answered excitedly! “Oh No….I am SO worried that will happen to my daughter too!!”
Here are some of my great reader responses! All anonymous, of course!
- “I didn’t do an epidural because I love my baby.”
- While I was pregnant with my 3rd child my Mother-in-law introduced me to someone and proceeded to tell them that this was my 3rd and final. Umm who made her boss over how many children I will or will not have?
- One guy asked if I had double checked with the doctor because it looked like I was having triplets… talk about a meltdown moment
- “Are you pregnant? AGAIN! Like mom said, you can teach ignorance, you can’t teach stupid.”
- “Wow! Your tits and ass are huge!” (from a 74 year old male patient of mine)
- A guy walking behind me didn’t realize I was pregnant, when he walked passed me he said, “oh wow, You should put a sign on your back that says WIDE LOAD!”
- “Are you having twins?” “No I’m not having twins.” “Are you sure?” No I’m so stupid I have no idea how many babies are in my stomach.
- “Aren’t you a bit big to be that far along?”
- When I went to my first Ob app. The nurse asked a list of questions. The stupidest, “do you and your husband have sexual intercourse?” I looked at her, then my belly, then her again. I said uhhhh yeah…..
- A woman I never met blurts out,”you’re pregnant?!” I just stared at her and someone said,”well yeah!” She retorted with,”I didn’t know, we all carry weight differently.”
- Not to take a bath or the baby will drown.
- “How much weight have you gained?”
- Some told me that I didn’t look pregnant and wanted to know if I was only faking the pregnancy to marry him and get his money?
- My favorite one wasn’t actually said to me, but to my husband… and from his mother no less… she asked him, actually had the audacity to ask if he was even sure that the baby was his.
- “It’s nice because you’ll still look pregnant after you have the baby, so you can use the pregnancy parking.”
- “You’re pregnant again? You don’t need to have them so close together cause you can’t spend enough time or love with them.”
- From my Mother-In-Law “Maybe you’re wrong..maybe u’re not pregnant..you shouldn’t be pregnant before my other daughter-in-law”
- “You don’t look old enough to be pregnant. Are you going to keep it?” I was 20.
- “Is it a boy or a girl?… Oh.”
- Someone told me that I was going to be in a wheel chair when my daughter graduated from college… I was gonna to be a old mom!! I was 23 when I had her.
- “Was it planned?”
- While shopping with my other children and pregnant with my 3rd…”you didn’t learn the first two times how babies are made?” Then pregnant with my 4th… “Don’t you think you have enough kids?”
- “Are you pregnant or just bloated?” I was about 32 weeks pregnant at the time.
- “I knew you were pregnant when I saw you in March,” Except I wasn’t pregnant yet.
- I was on the table waiting for my c-sec with my twins. I was talking to the NURSE and telling her they were boy/girl. Then she asked me “are they identical?” I said not when we change the diapers. You would think a nurse would know better.
- “You look better with a little fat on your face.”
- We all get this question over and over… but I ADORE this answer – “What’s it going to be?” I told one person I was hoping for a puppy they didn’t look impressed
- From my husband…on mothers day….”eeewwww….why are your nipples so dark?”
So…what have we learned here? First of all, be very careful with what you are saying to pregnant women… a foot in the mouth comment will stick with us far longer than you would ever think. AND, being on the receiving end of these comments is part of the badge of motherhood… it happens to all of us. Just nod, smile, walk away ….. and blog about it later!!
P.S. What is the stupidest unsolicited parenting advice you have received from a stranger? See some of our readers answers here! You won’t want to miss them…trust me!
Had the baby? Check out this one!!!
When we announced on Facebook recently, one person commented, “Hmmm”. What the heck is that? And it isn’t like our situation is “Hmmm” inducing. We’ve been married 4 years, and I just finished school. So rude.
What in the world. Just say nothing!!
Before I got pregnant, my husband’s family kept telling my husband that we would never have a baby. Once we started trying, it happened so fast that they were all shocked and embarrassed about the mean things they had said. But the unwanted comments didn’t stop there, my MIL said our baby would be born without a hand and a foot. I think my husband even believed this nonsense! And my MIL would constantly pat my belly without permission and talk loudly to the baby, saying things like “hello in there, I can’t wait to meet you.”
WHAT!! ARE YOU KIDDING ME????
I am the very lucky mom of three beautiful boys and currently expecting my fourth son. From the moment my husband and I let everyone in on our happy little secret, all we heard was, “This better be the girl, I know you want a girl, I hope it’s a girl, OMG what if it’s another boy?!” and many other gender sentiments. We were cool and calm about it but underneath it all, it was bothersome to think that our friends and family were more excited about gender than our new little bundle. I was asked significantly more often about our baby’s gender than about how I was feeling or the health of the baby. It’s really a shame that most of this came from those closest to us. Now when people ask the question, “What are you having?” I’ll reply with a sarcastic smile, “A healthy baby.”
I got the same thing with my third son!! I would get “Oh, I’m so sorry” “are you going to go for a girl?” I would just answer how much I already loved being the mother to two boys and now I am lucky enough to be having a third! Boys loooovvvee their mommas and now my family is complete!!
Exactly!
Tinha perdido um bebê, d´uma curta gestação, em outubro. Em maio seguinte me vi novamente grávida. Ao contar para uma amiga a reação dela foi: “Agora é verdade, ou é palhaçada como da última vez”?
I wish I knew what this meant, but I am certain I would think it was awful!
I’m Spanish, but I’ll try to translate 🙂
“I lost a baby, not very far into pregnancy, in October. Next may, I got pregnant again. When I told a friend, her reaction was: ‘is this time true, or is it a trick like last time?’ ”
I only hope she’s an ex friend now. What a heartless thing to say.
One more… the most annoying question AFTER I had my son is, “So, when the next one?” When I tell them we only will have one child, the string of rude comments and questions is unbearable!
1.) But you have to have one of each!
2.) You do know accidents happen? (As if we don’t thoroughly understand how sex and baby making works.)
3.) You’re not a real parent if you don’t have at least two.
4.) That’s selfish of you. Your son will have no one to play with.
5.) Don’t you like being a mother? Don’t you like your child?
On and on and on….
I just don’t get it…. mind blowing!
I empathise. People seem to start asking about “the next one” when you’re still recovering from giving birth. And many can’t seem to fathom why you’d only choose to have just one child, even when they know you had a really hard time with your baby. As if it’s anything to do with anyone else how many children my husband and I choose to have.
Those questions bug me SO MUCH after my sister has had infertility issues. You really never know what struggles people are having and that question can really be painful if someone wants to have a child or more children, but can’t. Even if they’re fertile and only want one, that’s 100% up to them!
Thank you for saying that. I have one child and he is simply amazing, but people constantly ask when I’ll have another. The tragic truth is that I have secondary infertility and will never have another child. Let it go, people. An only child can be just as happy and healthy as a child who was blessed with siblings.
Yes! I get this all the time! It’s so nice to know I am not the only one! My daughter is 6 and I still have people asking me!
I got the “was it on purpose?” question in its varying forms from several people. That, to me, is the most disrespectful of all the comments and questions you could ask a pregnant woman. At no point, whether pregnant or not, is it appropriate to ask anyone questions about their sex life unless you are a doctor and it’s relevant.
On that note, the most annoying question from the ob/gyn was how many partners I had had in the time period during which I got pregnant. Umm… ONE!! My husband was standing right there in the room with me. The doctor was lucky for that because I was about ready to ring his neck for some other really RUDE commentary in addition to this.
You would think THEY would know better! Geez!
When I was pregnant and working I had a coworker who just forgot I was actually a human, like she thought everything revolved around my pregnancy. When I ate she’d ask me if the baby was hungry, Um no, babies are constantly being fueled, I was the one that was hungry. Or if I wasn’t feeling good she’d ask if the baby was sick!? No, no she isn’t. And it was the same everyday. I had to walk away to stop myself from being rude.
Office doors are a beautiful thing
I had sooooo many people tell me that I was built for twins when I was pregnant with my daughter, and many were surprised to find out that there was only one. The kicker was the 2 docs that told me that too! One after measuring my cervix to be sure I wasn’t having premature labor, said it was super thick, and would handle 2 no problem. The second was right after I delivered, and he was surprised that she wasn’t bigger based on my size, then continued with, there was plenty of room for a second. Just what a new mom wants to hear!
No doubt!
My husband his family and I were sitting at the dinner table when we told his parents. His father was so excited. His mother on the other hand says. “Oh dear Lord why weren’t you two more careful? Now I have to deal with another one!” My husbands mouth and mine hit the floor, I of course started to cry. And he took care of his mother. She doesn’t and never has dealt with my child. She’s lucky I even let her hold him.
Monster in law!
1. Wen we told some of my HUSBANDS friends that we were having a baby one man replied very shocked, “Was it on purpose?” ummm yes???
2. A lady told me it was hard to tell if I was pregnant or just had too many jelly filled donuts.
3. My mother-in-law came and stayed 2 weeks with us. More than once she said “I swear you just get bigger everyday.”
Filters, people, filters!